This week—*waves hands around at the literal mess of laundry, bobby pins, safety pins, and nail polish bottles scattered all over the dining room table, along with the grass clippings tracked hither and yon on the floor*—was a lot.
It was also the last barrier between me and much-longed-for structure and routine.
At the point of writing, I’ve just sent one kiddo off to school (Grade 6). The other will soon head out the door—to our vehicle, because she asked to be driven on the first day instead of bussing—for the first day of Grade 10.
Weren’t they just this size…?
It is Back to School Season. I am so relieved.
And while the house is still a mess, it’s a bit less of a mess than it was yesterday. For the first time since we got back from Europe, I mopped the upstairs floors. I even cleaned the toilets, too. (That was on Wednesday, not Thursday, my first ever “shouldless” day, per Lisa!)
Okay! I’m back. Now both kids are at school, and Belle is actually heading straight from school to a babysitting gig so it’s a strangely quiet house.
These transitions always remind me of Julia Donaldson’s picture book A Squash and a Squeeze. (I checked and I wrote about this last September, too!) Yes, the chaos of summer does feel overwhelming at times, but it also makes the relief of a change of pace that much sweeter.
There were zero tears shed in our household by either parents or children. As much as I love my kids, I have never once shed a tear about them going to school, not even in the primary years. They are safe and they are learning, and I have extra bandwidth.
While I have days where I don’t accomplish much, this is my first official Shouldless Day. I started with a shower which felt amazing, followed by coffee.
I dropped Belle and a friend off at the high school. I went to the hardware store to look at paint samples for Indy’s bedroom. I met Joy for coffee and it was delightful to catch up with each other after so much time apart.
I had leftovers for lunch (a friend had prepared us a rice dish along with curried chicken which was delicious and, even better, something I didn’t have to cook myself).
I watched Emily Blunt interviews on YouTube because I love her accent and find celebrity interviews hilarious, especially when it’s Emily Blunt. Then I went through all the book suggestions I’ve had lately and updated my TBR in both Libby and at our local library.
My holds list is… very lengthy.
My feet were cold, so I warmed up a Magic Bag. Why stay cold when there is something I can do about it? I have a blanket on my lap. It’s overcast outside so I turned on a lamp for some cozy lighting. I continue to hold out against getting a cat, but if there were such a moment to have one, this would be it!
There are a lot of things I could be doing today, but nothing is critical and it will all get done. It feels good to celebrate this next season of family life some rest and ease.
Tomorrow I have a lot planned. For starters, I need to do an epic brain dump. There are so many things swirling around in my head and getting that all out on paper will be such a relief.
I had debated not writing a Happy Things Friday post on my Shouldless Day, but ended up deciding this is my favourite post to prep each week, and with warm feet and a sparkling water close at hand… this is a great way to spend part of this luxuriously open day.
Enough blathering! Let’s talk Happy Things. (And the first one might just be my absolute favourite.)
GNOME GRATITUDE
My endlessly creative blog friend Michelle is an enthusiastic participant in all things gratitude. I was delighted when she said she was joining my August gratitude practice, and even more delighted WHEN SHE POSTED A PICTURE OF GNOME LIGHTKEEPER LOGS printed off and displayed inside their dollhouse.
The cuteness of this is almost too much to bear and seeing this literally made my day.
MUD FUN
While I can enjoy a good adventure as much as the next person, I am NOT a fan of mess. But when we went to a local intertidal beach early last week with some visiting family, one thing led to another and before long there was nothing left to do but embrace the filth! (I stayed clean, and we did our best to wash the kids off in a little stream; this was yet another time I breathed a prayer of thanksgiving for washing machines and indoor plumbing!)
They were literally covered head-to-toe in mud.
We had taken boogie boards and they used those to skim/surf over the surface of the mud. They had an absolute blast, as one would expect. I’m not in a rush to repeat this experience, but I’m also glad it happened.
A FREE TRAMPOLINE
For a variety of reasons—predominantly cost and the fact they are notorious for injury—I have remained unmoved after years of both our children begging to have a trampoline.
But when one of Indy’s friends moved away and offered us their trampoline, I figured now was the right time.
Because it was free, it feels like a very low risk experiment. Worst case scenario, we can pass it on to another home after a trial run in our backyard.
Indy has spent HOURS and hours on this thing. He has perfected a back flip and comes in drenched in sweat and with sore core muscles. It’s a magnet for any kids that come to visit and I’m really excited to have this new addition to outdoor play.
THE ODYSSEY
We went to see The Odyssey in IMAX on Tuesday. It was worth the wait (we tried to get tickets weeks ago, but all the seats with decent views of the screen had been all sold out). It was definitely an epic film.
I don’t know if I was quite as wowed as I expected to be, but that’s always the danger when a movie is hyped so aggressively. But it was very entertaining and the cinematography was impressive, especially since so many things were done in a more traditional (work-intensive!) style of filming.
PATREON NEWS
My Patreon (Lighthouse Keepers) recently turned ONE!!! It’s become a special corner of the internet for me.
A note to any existing members: an annual membership option (with a 25% discount) has now been unlocked! It takes a year of maintaining a Patreon community to get access to this benefit and I am so happy to be able to offer that now. For anyone looking to support my work and save money, this is a great time to chop two carrots with one knife.*
*A nicer saying than kill two birds with one stone; I *think* it was Jenny who alerted me to this alternative wording. If not, a huge thank-you to whoever did that.
BONUS HAPPY THINGS
- Homemade raspberry scones. A few times I’ve topped them with homemade blueberry jam my sister-in-law made, which is spectacular. It was just sugar, blueberries, and cinnamon, but it’s delicious.
- Grapefruit sparkling water.
- Sunsets. One day last week we went to a local beach for supper (we grabbed pizza takeout on the way, so it was EASY). The air was cool, but pleasant, and it was so nice to have everyone (and all the mess of a meal with five kids in tow) outside.
- Cooler weather. Winter can be a tough sell for me, but I don’t try to hide the fact that fall is my favourite season. I am delighted to be wearing sweaters!
- I don’t have a before picture, but my parents’ cupboard of storage containers was OUT OF CONTROL. It was such a confusing jumble of tops and bottoms. About 15 minutes of work had it looking So. Much. Better. (And it’s not much more functional!)
- Despite the trip being so different than I had anticipated, the kids were still able to enjoy a lot of their favourite lake activities. Topping Indy’s list was fishing. He and John spent hour after hour by the lake and they caught (and released) a lot of fish.
- Fresh corn from a local farm market. So good—crisp, sweet, and the best corn we’ve had this year.
- A good night of sleep. Nights have been especially disjointed lately. but Wednesday night I slept like a rock. It was wonderful!
- A fresh haircut. I trimmed Belle’s hair a few months ago, but admittedly am no expert. She was able to get an appointment with our hairdresser for the day before school started—her first haircut in over 6 months!
- A great orthodontist appointment. I could have blinked and missed it, she was in the chair for such a short amount of time. He said she had “graduated to not needing to wear her daytime retainer.” Bwhahaha. She wore a retainer in the day for about… two weeks. But I didn’t tell him that. Everything looks great which is such a relief. She has been great about wearing both retainers at night. We have another follow-up scheduled in 6 months and then we’ll chat about long-term maintenance.
- We have two new pets. My brother-in-law mentioned that snails can do a great job of cleaning up algae in fish tanks. Since Indy’s betta fish is named Ferrari, I suggested we call these snails Lewis and Charles, after the current Formula One drivers for Ferrari. (I thought that was pretty clever.) The jury is still out on how effective these snails are going to be, but it’s fun to have more living creatures in the tank and it’s pretty fun to see all the different places they end up in the run of a day.
I’m writing this post Thursday, but barring any major issue John and Indy head deep-sea fishing tomorrow [GAH! We’re supposed to get a major storm tomorrow and they just cancelled the fishing which is understandable but also stinks because this was their last chance to get out during cod season… whomp, whomp; Indy hasn’t gotten home yet and he is going to be so disappointed]. Belle has a day of school (followed by babysitting), and I will get off my tush and hopefully accomplish a lot.
Over and out for now. Happy Weekending!
Your turn.
- Tell me some Happy Things from your week.
- How often do you visit a hairdresser?
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Hurrah for magic bags and blankets! The mud day- I shudder to think of the clean up but it’s magic for the kids. It’s too bad about the fishing trip- but Indy is resilient- he’ll find something fun.
And trampolines are awesome- we got one in Dec ’19- and boy, did it come in handy during covid. The kids could go out for hours and burn some energy. My kids are now too big for ours- maybe time to pass it on.
Happy? I had a really good day at work Wed, and I’ve prepped ahead so I can enjoy a weekend away without doing anything. My son got the lead in the fall play- this will be fun! Between band and the play, we won’t be seeing him much in the next two months…
Yes, I’m not sure if they’ll end up being able to reschedule the fishing trip for this year which is sad… but he does get to fish a lot and he handled it like a champ. When we told him yesterday he paused for a minute and then said: “Okay.” And went back to playing on the trampoline.
Yay for prepping ahead. It really can make all the difference for relaxing into the weekend. And congrats to your son.
YAYYYY! I love hearing about shouldless days. That is such a bummer about the fishing trip though (I guess Indy went regretfully to school today instead? Poor guy). Love the first day of school photos- Belle is so pretty and her hair is GORGEOUS!!!
We had a trampoline for years and it was GREAT. Except my husband always complained because it was a hazard during hurricane season. We finally got rid of it last year and it was a little sad. Your kids will get a lot of use out of yours!
Happy things from the week- well, we survived and are looking forward to the weekend!
He did have to go to school… imagine that horror, not getting to miss THE SECOND DAY OF THE SCHOOL YEAR.
I have been thinking about the need to reinforce the base, especially as we do tend to get high winds during the Atlantic hurricane season. My sister-in-law mentioned sand bags and I need to add that to my to-do list.
Enjoy the weekend. Sometimes that’s the single best thing about the end of the week. I hope it’s restorative.
TRAMPOLINE! That reminds me of The Simpsons episode, which you may or may not be familiar with. When we got our trampoline, I immediately texted my friend Hannah to say TRA-MAP-OLINE! TRA-BOP-OLINE! and she got it. If you don’t know the episode, this will be a very puzzling comment.
So much mud!!!
Congrats on your one-year with Patreon!!!
I haven’t watched a Simpsons episode in… decades! So it is a puzzling comment to me but no doubt will ring a bell for someone.
The kids are delighted and I have loved having a self-contained form of energy release for Indy.
Oh I am so with you on the mess, but then being glad they had the experience after. We got a trampoline during Covid and it’s still a hit with the kids – sometimes they just go lay on it and talk, and have made up so many games involving balls and hoses because boys!! When we first got it, the little kids would say “I’m going to jump on the tramp” and they didn’t understand the reference, were merely shortening the word, so it always made me laugh 🙂 HAPPY BACK TO SCHOOL!!!!
The mess is real and continues to persist, but I’ve made a few improvements. There is more laundry waiting for me right this second… but I am going to look the other direction.
Ha! Kids really do say the darndest things sometimes 🙂
I once read a book written by a long haul trucker who specialized in cross country moves (The Long Haul by Finn Murphy) and he said the three things that most often get left behind when people move are pianos, hot tubs, and trampolines. So I’m glad you guys were able to give the trampoline a new home! Our yard isn’t big enough for one, but our friends have one and our kids love going over and jumping on it.
OMG all that mud! Our county parks department has a MudFest at one of the local parks/nature center every year and I always am torn between thinking that the kids would have so much fun doing that but also that I don’t want to have to to clean that up.
It was a bit daunting to put together at first but wasn’t actually too bad in the end.
It was… a lot of mud. I think the fact I didn’t go into it planning on the kids getting muddy helped. I would have likely said no from the get-go. But it was relatively spontaneous and it was fun and I’m glad we did it and also have NO plans to do it again any time soon.
Amazing how only 15 minutes of tidying can make a huge difference! All it takes is someone with a fresh view and extra motivation. I bet it felt good, too!
So you don’t have any extra work with the snails, they just look after themselves and clean up? Very cool!!
The snails just feed off the algae that naturally grows, so there’s no maintenance with them!
A bit of tidying can make a big difference to both how the house looks… and to my mood!
I always enjoyed my snails. They would lay their eggs on the sides of the tank and we could watch the babies grow and hatch.
Ohhh. I never even thought about baby snails!!!
Your shouldless day sounds wonderful. There is definitely a time and place for that, then you can regroup and get done what needs to get done!
That’s great that you’re getting so much use of your trampoline! We had one for several years, but after two broken arms on two separate kids, we got rid of it 😟
I’ve been cutting my own hair for about nine years now. It’s wavy/curly so very forgiving- I’m sure it is uneven!
I always feel guilty when I do “nothing” but time and time again I have learned that in the long run I am far more productive (and content) when I take some dedicated time to rest.
Eeks! TWO BROKEN ARMS. La la la la la (*plugs ears*)
I am so hoping that doesn’t happen for us!!! I know they are notorious… but also so fun. I’m hoping because of their ages they’ll be a bit more responsible????
Hooray for back to school! Grump that the fishing had to be cancelled.
That trampoline is going to get some good use!
And the weather wasn’t even THAT bad, so I feel like the fishing could have gone ahead alright. Oh well. Win some, lose some.
Happy back to school! How did the kids find returning after six months away from school?
Ahhh the mud! We have some similar pictures…
Happy things here:
– A nice evening walk with my mil. Our relationship is complicated, but this was a genuinely enjoyable time.
– Finishing sewing the boys matching shirts.
– A first grader with a good attitude for school this week!
It’s only been two days, but the kids have been settling in really well which is a big relief. I think it helps they only had 2 days.
I know you have had some very challenging issues with boundaries with your MIL, so those good memories are especially precious.
what a great shoddiness day post! I rarely have one and always fill my days doing things, I hope I get one truly no plan day without family at home one day.
glad you liked Odyssey, I loved it! and I agree, it was super hyped that I was worried I’d be disappointed but glad it did not and I find the meaning timely for our world now.
The Odyssey was epic! And the kids really enjoyed it, too!
My friend has a little trampoline in her garage that she uses for exercise, it’s a great workout.
OMG on the mud! That is EPIC. I’m glad they had the experience. I have a picture of my daughter in our back yard playing in the mud when she was little…I didn’t want her to get her clothes dirty, so she took them off and played naked. HA! Much easier to clean.
I am glad that you enjoyed The Odyssey. I thought it was visually stunning. I had my issues, but they were mostly to do with the story being different than the book. I feel torn…part of me liked that they made it a story for today. Part of me doesn’t like that they made it a story for today.
Nakedness WOULD have made the cleanup a lot easier though I think we’re beyond that stage at a public beach.
So many happy things! Thank you for including the gnomes’ gratitude list! They feel like celebrities now! Well, gotta go sign up for the yearly Patreon! I love that space!
That is an epic shouldless day, and you did everything right! Good for you!
Belle’s hair continues to be the stuff of dreams, sigh. I wish my hair was so full and long and gorgeous!
To answer your question, I usually go every 3-4 months to the hair dresser. I do the whole shebang: color, cute, and style, so it’s not cheap but definitely not as expensive as it was when I was doing highlights/balayage.
So many good things in this post.
Not gonna lie, my skin became a little twitchy with the mud play. I can see why it’s fun for the kids though!! But like you, messy stuff isn’t my fave. You are one sweet, brave mama!
I can’t believe Belle is in tenth grade—that escalated quickly. Her hair is SO pretty!
I used to go to my Mom’s house for visits, and I always ended up organizing or cleaning something, and she was so appreciative. There’s nothing nicer than an organized tupperware cabinet.
Pet snails!! 😁
Yay, you took a shouldless day! I find it so much easier to cut myself some slack and let myself relax when I put the boundary of the day being “shouldless” around it. I don’t feel guilt and see it as a way to invest in myself/my mental health. I love that yours coincided with the kids’ return to school. Being alone in the house is a thing of wonder!!!
I had a physical reaction to the pick of Indy covered in mud. AHHHHHHHH! I have sensory issues and hate being dirty so I could not handle being covered in mud like that! But I am sure my children, especially Will, would LOVE it!!