And just like that, we’re more than halfway through November. Christmas parties start this month. THIS MONTH.
I’m ready for it – mostly the holiday food and Hallmark movies and all the twinkly lights.
This week was good. Good does not mean it wasn’t hard. I’m coming to realize that exploring difficult experiences (from past and present) is a bit like peeling back an onion – you find layer after layer of bitterness. But, then, you reach the core and chop all those layers up into manageable chunks and mellow them out – at least a bit – by sautéing them in a warm pan.
A few things that helped:
- My Bible recap. Currently reading through Job which is so fitting for this season of life. God has been sprinkling promises and hope into my days.
- Jesus – My Rock. John – my rock. Joy – my other rock.
- THERAPY!
- I don’t have to like this moment, I just have to get through it.
- I don’t have to fix all of this really well, by myself, immediately. I just have to figure out a path through, somehow.
- Coping = finding a way through.
- In the words of an Imagine Dragons song: It’s okay to be not okay.
- What would I say to a friend in this situation? Say that to myself.
- I can do hard things.
This tapping video. It really does help! No one is more shocked than me.
Music. Always music. In particular, these three songs…
- Stained Glass Window by Cochren & Co
- Hallelujah Anyway by Rend Collective
- Good Mood by RICHLIN
The long weekend was so needed. I took a 2-hour nap on Sunday (of course that night I could not get to sleep, but while I was napping it was worth it). I enjoyed some at-home date nights with John; we watched Oppenheimer and finished the Till Murder Do Us Part docuseries with the “Bob Balaban” lookalike. I met Joy at our favourite coffee shop for an Earl Grey and conversation; how I treasure that friendship.
Since Monday was a holiday – and Tuesday one of the kids ended up staying home from school with a bit of a temp – everything has felt a bit off-kilter. Like, how is it already Friday again? But I am here for weekends, so I say bring it on.
In no particular order, some Happy Things from the week.
IT’S BAAAACCCCCKKKKK!!!
San is hosting her annual Secret SANta Swap. Swing on over to this post to sign up. It is one of my favourite new Christmas traditions and this will be my third year participating.
THRIFTING (INCLUDING A MATERNITY COAT)
Since the kids were off on Monday – and A really wanted to find another Christmas sweater – we swung by our favourite thrift shop while out running errands.
No this is NOT an announcement of any sort, but I found a coat I loved and it happened to be a maternity coat. I hummed and hawed and texted some friends for input – and then bought it for $6. I have worn it all week and it is so warm and, not surprising given its purpose, VERY roomy. It is like wearing a giant, cozy blanket and I already adore this thing. Thankfully, I think oversized coats are “in” and for $6 it seemed worth the risk.
I also bought three new comfy sweaters and a pair of light jeans (all my other pairs are black or dark blue). The pants are fine, but mostly I hate any and all pants that aren’t made of Spandex or meant to be worn to bed.
COZY THINGS
Candles (every night) and hot cocoa (one night). These candles are such a happy thing for me – it’s like we all heave a collective, contented sigh when the lights go off and the candles come on.
FINISHING MY ROME RECAPS
I went back and re-posted all the recaps from our 2023 trip to Rome that were lost to the internet ether when my old site was deleted. I still had the text, so I just needed to reinsert the relevant pictures. Still, it was an effort. I backdated them since I’d posted them so recently on my old blog but if you’re interested, they’re all linked here.
MY YEAR OF REST NOTEBOOK
While I’m still quite certain my 2024 will NOT involve goals, I do still love to track things (we monitor what we measure, right?).
With that in mind, I bought a pretty DollarStore notebook so I can record things I do/choices I make that support my aim to make 2024 a Year of Rest.
The first entry? Stepping down from a volunteer holiday role that would have required 20-30 hours of commitment, including a chunk of time during a particularly hectic week. I sent an e-mail this week to let the organizer know that I can’t participate anymore. While it was something I was genuinely looking forward to in principle, the only sensation I felt about it lately was dread.
And 3 sentences in an e-mail removed it from my plate entirely.
Note to self. If I’m actively dreading something, can I just NOT DO IT? Why do I so often fail to realize this is often an option?
HOLIDAY DECOR (WITH NONE OF THE WORK)
Since I was napping (see intro above) – and L and John were at his basketball scrimmage – A decorated the mantle and assembled/decorated the downstairs artificial tree. 100% independently. And she EVEN SWEPT UP THE LITTLE PLASTIC NEEDLES THAT CAME OFF.
She has her moments – oh goodness does she ever – but my heart was so happy to see these things checked off MY list by someone else.
While I loved the idea of these things going up, I really didn’t have the energy to do it myself. Three cheers for a very festive twelve-year-old daughter. Also, didn’t she do an amazing job?
I came out from my nap to see this…
MY HAIRCUT
I’ve gotten questions about my haircut/keratin treatment. My natural hair is very wavy AND frizzy. It’s hard to get my hair smooth. The keratin treatment does relax it somewhat (so there is a bit less wave), but for the most part, this is NOT a straightening treatment. My hair will still dry wavy if I don’t do anything with it, but it won’t be nearly as frizzy.
Since the cut, I’ve been washing it every other day and letting it dry partway in a hair wrap and then I either blow dry it – or leave it wet! – and run a straightener over it in the morning. I can also use a diffuser (pic above) to go curly. It’s not a huge and noticeable difference, but I’d say it’s 30-50% easier to manage.
BONUS ROUND
- Prepping and sending some Christmas cards. Yes, it’s early. No, I don’t care. Judge if you will, but I had the cards and I can’t actually cross this to-do off my list until the cards are in the mail. I addressed about a dozen at a leisurely pace and will send things in waves over the next few weeks whenever I feel motivated to tackle some more.
- Food. Highlights were eating tuna filling with my FAVOURITE beet crackers, raw cauliflower and snap peas with a homemade dip, multiple mugs of coffee with my new peppermint mocha creamer, and brownies (made from a cake mix, of all things!).
- Rearranging L’s room + organizing A’s room. We did this as a way to fill an afternoon and it was FUN! I know this is not everyone’s idea of fun, but I thoroughly enjoyed it. A and I worked together; L and John worked together.
- Reading a book in a comfy chair.
This photo/thought from Kae. I have been ruminating on the concept of Voluntary Simplicity ever since. And it fits in very well with my Year of Rest/Shmita.
- I SUBMITTED MY LAST SET OF QUARTERLY REPORTS IN MY PROJECT MANAGEMENT ROLE. This felt…good. I also feel very content in my decision to step down from this job. Not even the slightest twinge that I should have stayed for another year.
I SAVED THE BEST FOR LAST
My niece got married last Saturday. I keep going back through the wedding pictures and smiling. So many sweet moments captured of a wonderfully special day. Here are just a few of my favourites:
And that’s it from me this week. I hope you all have a fantastic weekend with many happy things.
Your turn. Favourite type of cracker? Tuna – yes or no (I loooovve John’s tuna filling)? Did you play any team sports in school? Do you have any Christmas decor up in your home yet? Do you handle most of the decorating in your household – or does someone else do the majority of the work?
sarah
You look adorbs in those jeans 🙂
Elisabeth
Aww. Thanks, Sarah.
mbmom11
Decorating for Xmas varies from year to year, usually I do it. We gave a perfect tree in our yard for outdoor lights. But I don’t put out too much because I’ll need to take it down.
May I say that those bridesmaids dresses are gorgeous- and I love that the groom wore a green suit! Stylish and outstanding!
Elisabeth
I wish we had good outdoor trees for lights. I’m a relatively minimalist decorator inside, but it still looks very festive. But our outside game is very, very weak 🙁
Ally Bean
So much to process here. I lean into the saying “the only way through it is to do it.” Kind of like what you’re doing now. Good luck.
I like the jeans and am laughing about the roomy coat. Both look great on you. Your holiday decorating is amazeballs. So pretty. Do you hire out to help those of us who are less capable?
I’ve thought about doing keratin treatments yet never quite have done it. Maybe next spring/summer when the humidity returns. Your niece’s wedding party look beautiful. I adore the color the bridesmaids wore, so powerful yet respectful. The bride’s smile is everything.
Elisabeth
Ha! Maybe A has a built-in career option ahead of her?
I cannot stop raving to my family (and anyone who happens to be around me) about this coat. I don’t care if it looks like a giant garbage bag on me (I don’t think it does), it is perhaps the most comfortable coat I have ever worn. Very glad I spent the $6!
Yes the colour of the dresses was soooo pretty. Rich and, like you say, powerful, but really sets off/compliments her dress. I wish we could have been there, but the pictures are just so lovely (I only posted the TIP of the iceberg of them).
Jenny
Oh, those wedding photos are amazing!!! I love the one of your other niece seeing the bride for the first time. So precious.
Everything is just happier and cozier during the holiday season, right? I can’t wait to get my Christmas decorations up. It’s funny, when I take out my fall decorations I love them, but now everything looks so blah and drab. Well, a week from today we’ll have the tree up (we always do it on Black Friday.) I’m excited!
I love the Year of Rest notebook. I think I’m going to follow your lead and have a special notebook for my yearly theme in 2024 (although I don’t know what that is yet.) I always get halfway through the year and think “WHAT was my theme again?” Monitoring it would be a good idea.
I love your hair! I’ve been thinking about a keratin treatment for my daughter. Her hair is wavy/curly and with our humidity, it can get very frizzy. I’ll have to look into it- are there any downsides?
I hope you have a great weekend!
Elisabeth
Yes – there is something so wonderfully cozy about this time of year.
Ha – I hope I’ll be able to remember my theme is rest. Time will tell!
The only downside I can see is cost (it was about $200 and it needs to be done every 6-8 months; I have no idea what other people spend on their hair, but I don’t spend even close to $200 a year on my hair. This did include a wash and cut, but it’s pricey. And, the treatment my hairdresser did kinda smells after. It’s fading now – 2 weeks out – but when it’s wet it still smells a bit “funky.”) There are a broad range of TYPES of keratin treatment, though, and I believe some really do make your hair much straighter. This is very gentle, though, which I wanted – but the results maybe aren’t as dramatic as some of the other relaxing treatments.
NGS
I spend about $75 for a hair cut and style every 7-8 weeks and I buy shampoo and conditioner every other month or so that cost $40. I consider myself low-maintenance. I am now starting to reevaluate my life choices.
Elisabeth
No. I’m just shamelessly unkempt sometimes. Though maybe haircuts are also cheaper around here? I pay $36 for a wash, cut, and dry normally. And I do that 1-2x/year.
Suzanne
Oh my goodness, those wedding photos are so beautiful! Congratulations to your niece!
Love your haircut and your manicure! And your festive decor is so beautiful. I am usually a strict Wait Until December decorator (for myself, not for anyone else) but this is making me want to get to it.
So glad you found so many happy things this week. Thinking of you.
Elisabeth
I feel like our decorations keep going out earlier and earlier and earlier. Though, to be fair, I have a pretty strict rule about not being Remembrance Day and that is ALWAYS Nov 11th, so it’s not going to creep into October.
Also, the fact that A wanted to do this solo was just amazing. I get all the benefit with none of the effort, which I’m here for right now 🙂
Nicole MacPherson
Congrats to your niece!
Your hair looks great and so do your new clothes – that coat, like I said, you cannot tell it’s maternity. It just looks nice and cozy.
Your house is so festive! I love it. Sweet girl, how wonderful is that.
xoxoxoxo
Elisabeth
IT IS SO COZY! Perhaps this is the secret to warm winter gear?
Katie
Elisabeth! You look STUNNING in all of those photos!!
I am obsessed with your thrift store finds – I tend to only get books from ours, although I recently bought A a festive jumper.
I’m planning a trip to Rome with my best friend next year so your photos are just so great to see and inspiring!
Elisabeth
You will LOVE Rome. Love it, Katie! So excited for you <3
J
Your wavy hair is my #goals, but my hair is straight and will NOT hold a curl. I have learned to accept it and like that it is EASY. I do blow dry it most days, it looks better that way, but if I don’t it’s OK.
I bought my Christmas cards last year at the 75% off sales. We don’t do photo cards, we do old fashioned in the box cards, where you write something inside. I was thinking I might get started on them soon. I used to write long letters in them, but I don’t really have the energy anymore, and I don’t want to do a Christmas letter for some reason. Who knows.
My friend does tapping for anxiety, it really helps her too.
Elisabeth
I would gladly trade you my waves for straight hair!
I am not doing a Christmas newsletter this year (I’m actually posting about that next week) and I am SO relieved.
I’ve been really surprised by how effective the tapping technique can be.
NGS
Christmas decorating in our house is The Best. We drag everything out from the basement and it takes us about 1.5-2 hours. My husband puts on holiday music, we make hot beverages, and it’s delightful because we do it together and we have so much fun. When I was young, holiday decorating was fraught with my mom making passive aggressive comments and my dad getting aggressive aggressive because the lights weren’t put away correctly. I LOVE that as an adult, some of those bad memories are erased with joyful ones. PLUS! The house has cozy lights! We will be putting up the tree next weekend unless something terrible happens and I can’t wait!
My volunteer gig is up at the end of the year and I’m so excited. I have been sending a lot of transition emails and I can already feel my stress levels going down about it. I have two or three more big events that I need to do before I’m done, done, but I cannot wait for 2024 when it’s entirely off my plate!
Elisabeth
This does sound like THE BEST. We tend to get things out a bit at a time, but I don’t always set the right mood (for the record, A played Christmas music off Spotify the whole time she was decorating, so SHE knows how to do things right).
Sorry Christmas involved so much aggression when you were younger – sigh – but glad you and Dr. BB have made this new, happier way of doing things an annual tradition. Can’t wait to see pictures of your tree.
And YAY. I am so relieved for you about the volunteer gig. Three cheers and a confetti of gold stars for knowing the time was right to move on.
Lindsay
I feel like so many in the initial list were meant for me to find today <3 we are decorating this weekend and it will be an all-in effort. Lil Momma has decided to go all-out on her room, so she may also need a supervisor before she knocks down a wall or tries to hang lights where lights may not want to be hung!
Elisabeth
Sorry you’ve had (what I assume) is a tough week <3
Enjoy the festive decor! I have a very "enthusiastic" decorator in my house, too 🙂
Beckett @ Birchwood Pie
Yes how is it the weekend already? It’s great but where did the week go?
I love snappeas. They’re crunchy, satisfying, not greasy, and possibly healthy so what more can you ask from a snack? Tuna is hit and miss for me. I like it once in a while but not for days on end. I go through spells where I keep making a “tuna” chickpea salad on repeat, and now that you mention it, it’s been a while since I’ve had that.
My husband is in charge of all holiday decorating and it is fabulous!
Meike
Those wedding pictures and the happy faces are the best!
No decorations up yet. It will wait until after Thanksgiving. I am usually the one doing the inside and my husband is doing the outside.
Ernie
What a beautiful bride. I love those photos. I do most of the decorating, if not all. It is not my favorite thing,. I also do all of the Christmas card writing, designing, addressing, and I do 99% of the gift buying. I’m not in panic mode yet, but my plate is pretty full this year. No idea how it will all get done. I do believe that I will be scaling back on the gift buying.
I related to much of your notes about I CAN DO HARD THINGS and about reading the book of Job. Sorry that you have a difficult situation to navigate through. It sounds really challenging. I’m glad therapy is helping. I need to touch base with Reg and see if he thinks a few sessions with the sport psychologist will be of any help to him.
I love naps. Hooray for the weekend.
Elisabeth
Doing little bits of decorating, a little bit at a time, I love. Doing a big blitz by myself is NOT fun. We’re pretty minimalist though, and I think I put up less and less each year. So other than our main upstairs tree, as of yesterday, we are DONE Christmas decorating. Hooray.
Therapy has been such a Godsend. A few times I’ve wondered if I’ve been making progress?! Now I realize I have learned so much about myself and how things from my past inform my current reality. She is also a Christian, so to have someone who approaches mental health from a faith-based perspective has been a true gift <3
Shelly
Yes to Tuna. Your thrift store looks great if those photos are from it? Our thrift stores do not look like that!
I’m sorry it’s been really hard. Leaning on your rocks and therapy sound like great supports.
Happy weekend.
Elisabeth
Yup – that’s my FAVOURITE of all the thrift stores I visit.
coco
I love the idea of having a journal to write down things that matter. I want to track moments of AWE!
love all your thrift store clothing. Isn’t it like treasure hunt?
Elisabeth
Awe. What a GREAT journaling prompt.
And yes, I think that’s one of the reasons I love thrifting so much. Aside from the low prices, it does feel like a treasure hunt and there is a bit of an adrenaline rush when you find something lovely.
San
I love your Happy Things posts although I will never be able to comment on everything… so much good stuff 🙂
I really love your thrift store finds (AGAIN, you’re the queen of thrifting) and if you hadn’t said anything, nobody could have told that the jacket is a maternity coat.)
I am so impressed with A’s holiday decorating. That’s wonderful that she’s old enough – and enthusiastic enough – to take this off your plate. We haven’t started decorating yet (maybe next weekend or the weekend after), but I’ve gotten some candles out. 🙂
Your niece is a stunning bride! Congratulations to the happy couple 🙂 I guess you have a new nephew-in-law now!
P.S. Thanks so much for spreading the word about the Secret SANta Swap 🙂 It’s going to be a blast and I am so happy you’re participating again 🙂
Elisabeth
I do love thrifting. I just came back from a really quick session with some new friends!
I’m excited about the swap!
Tobia | craftaliciousme
I am always amazed what great things you find in thrift stores.
The wedding pictures are gorgeous.
How wonderful that A got up and decorated while you were napping what a wonderful surprise. I don’t decorate anything before December 1. Christmas tree doesn’t go up before Dec 23. It is just our way. The husband loves decorating. So if he finds time he does other wise I will. We’ll see.
Elisabeth
I can’t imagine putting the tree up that late in December. My Dad grew up with it only going up December 24th and only adults decorated the tree.
I assume you celebrate your main “Christmas” on December 24th in Germany?
Grateful Kae
As always, so many great things. I love that you have finished your Rome recaps. That will be such a treasured memory to look back on. I go into crazy detail on my travel posts, and while I realize it is probably not necessary for OTHERS to read about every detail and see so many photos, it’s definitely one of those things that I will cherish later. If I don’t do it “in the moment”, I will likely never even go back and so much as make a photo album! So I try hard to push myself to get those memories documented ASAP. The blog format is so fun for that, too.
Love the new jeans and the coat, etc. And the hair! So so cute. 🙂 Huge congrats to your beautiful niece! I am sure you were really sad to not be there…. but unfortunately, living far away from people can make those things hard. Still looking forward to seeing and reading more about your year of rest, too. I’m glad the quote I sent was meaningful to you- I liked it a lot too. 🙂
Elisabeth
I love, love, love looking back at the recaps. My Paris recaps are a bit more…sparse, since I wrote them long before I started blogging, but I’m really glad I had that that text, too.
Lisa’s Yarns
I love the wedding pics so much. Your niece was a gorgeous bride and I love her husband’s green suit! So fun!!
I am glad you had lots of moments of joy to offset all of the other stuff. I so wish I could go thrifting with you at that store. You always find some real gems!! It’s nice to have a looser fitting winter coat so you can easily wear layers under it and not feel like a stuffed sausage. 😉
Elisabeth
The green suit is so fun! And I love the dark green dresses.
When you manage to visit Nova Scotia, one of the “destinations” will have to be my favourite thrift store 🙂
Melissa
Yay, for all your happy things. I enlarged the photo to check out your Bruce’s expression and it truly is priceless.
Lucky you getting the decorations put up for you. We always put up our tree and decorations on the 1st December. I used to supervise the kids doing it but now it’s down to me because no more kids around to do the job
Michelle G.
I love the coat! I’m a big fan of a big coat with room for many layers of clothing. The decorations look so beautiful! There are so many gorgeous, happy pictures in this post! I can’t say I love tuna, but it’s OK occasionally. I pretty much like every kind of cracker!
Stephany
LOL @ the maternity coat. I put a maternity pillow on my Christmas list this year and my brother was like, “Uhh… Steph? Do you need to tell me something?” No, I just want a comfy pillow that supports my back and belly! That coat looks very comfy/cozy, and I’m glad you went for it.
My apartment is all decorated for Christmas! I’m not putting up a tree this year so the most time-consuming part of decorating (for me) didn’t happen. I’m going to miss the tree, but not the work! And it’s up to me to decorate. The cats just want to lay in piles of garland, but not help me put it up. Gah!
Elisabeth
Why can’t they make adult clothes as cute as kids clothes and as comfortable as maternity clothes? IS THIS TOO MUCH TO ASK?
Decorating is a lot of work; if I was going to be away over Christmas I don’t think I’d put up a tree either!
Anne
It makes me happy to read that you are doing what you need to do for your emotional and physical well-being. Despite everything you are going through, you also manage to find the joy in the everyday. Thank you for sharing all of this with the rest of us. <3
Elisabeth
Thanks, friend. Sometimes joy feels like a harder fight, but it’s always there – even if it’s mixed with tears and challenges.