My Review of Big Time by Laura Vanderkam + A Giveaway

For Mother’s Day, I knew exactly what I wanted: a relaxing day spent alone (the key ingredient in my plans for relaxation) on the couch in our apartment.

There were two loads of laundry thrown into the mix because… needs must. But the rest of the time was deliciously mine. My husband took the kids while I luxuriated in those precious commodities called peace and quiet.

I sipped mint hot chocolate out of my new Moomin mug, took a long, scalding shower, and settled into a little cocoon of blankets and pillows to finish reading Laura Vanderkam’s newest book Big Time.

In other words, it was practically perfect.

I also felt like I’d spent this special day in a way that would make Laura proud. Some professional progress (I’m writing this book review up for my blog, after all), nurturing relationships (I admire Laura), and self-care (reading a great time management book happens to be my idea of a good time; obviously I’m the life of every party).

I’ll always have a special place in my heart for Laura’s work after being a participant in her Tranquility by Tuesday test group. “Three times a week makes a habit” was the final nudge I needed to create an online space to call my own. In a way, she’s the very reason you’re reading this blog post today… about her.

I couldn’t wait to get my hands on a copy of Laura’s most recent book, Big Time: A Simple Path to Time Abundance, released in North America on May 5th. Unfortunately, publication in Europe comes a bit later, but she graciously sent me a digital copy.

It came with no strings attached. She didn’t ask me to mention the book on my blog, and when I told her I planned to, she certainly didn’t tell me what to say. Without further ado, here are some thoughts on Big Time.

It was, as expected, a delightful read.

I adore Laura’s writing style. For lack of a better word, I find it calming. Or, in the words of the Wall Street Journal, “her approach is gentle and reassuring.”

Yup, that’s it!

She’s efficient in life and writing—she has five kids and manages a busy career as a time management expert, so I’d expect nothing less—but her books never feel rushed. There’s a coziness to them. My Danish sister-in-law would probably call it hygge.

It certainly felt that way as I cuddled up on a chilly May day (in Finland, spring feels suspiciously winter-adjacent) reading about subtle reframes I can use to approach how I spend my days, weeks, months, and years.

Laura’s books never make me feel bad about how I’m currently spending my time. Thank goodness; I’m all too familiar with reading something from the self-improvement genre and feeling like I need a complete life overhaul.

She offers a uniquely expansive approach to time management. She rarely advocates cutting things out of life entirely. Instead, she encourages saying yes to things that excite us, questioning clichéd narratives about time scarcity (I admittedly fall into this trap), and making small but meaningful adjustments that compound over time.

That’s one of my favourite things about her philosophy: she assumes real life exists. Kids, fatigue, obligations, unpredictability, laundry, chronic health conditions. The answer isn’t perfection, it’s building slightly better defaults. (I suspect she’d pipe up and add that investing in good childcare helps, too!)

If the title didn’t give it away, her latest book focuses on a concept she terms “Big Time.” She gently recommends discarding some of the go-to excuses about how cramped and hectic our schedules are and recognizing that, when we zoom out, there is almost certainly room to make time for more of the activities that make life feel rich.

Given the current state of my days, I couldn’t help drawing comparisons to executing a months-long trip around Europe with two kids. It decidedly feels like choosing the bigger life, rich with adventure and opportunity.

It also requires… a lot of effort.

I nodded when I read this line: “All magic is just labor, hidden well.”

When I post about gorgeous gondola rides in Venice or fairy-tale churches, there’s a tremendous amount of invisible labour happening behind the scenes. Planning, logistics, schlepping children across countries while everyone is overtired and thirsty.

But it’s worth the effort.

Laura doesn’t frame meaningful experiences as effortless. She acknowledges that most worthwhile things require effort. For instance, she assumes readers are familiar with the time vortex of smartphones and suggests a little workaround: spending a few minutes reading an e-book before allowing mindless scrolling through Instagram.

She writes: “Most likely, you’ll keep reading the book because effortful fun is, in fact, fun, once you overcome the initial resistance.”

So many of the best parts of life are wonderful precisely because they require something of us. In that effort, we realize time—and people—are valuable. Exchanging our limited hours for something worth the effort (reading a book, calling a friend, volunteering at a soup kitchen, planning a trip, going to a writing workshop) often ends up feeling far more memorable than whatever easy distraction we might have defaulted to instead.

That said, Laura has tracked her time closely for years and keeps things realistic:

“I wasted a lot of time in 2024, and I did a lot, because 8,784 hours is a lot of time. I spent gobs of time on pointless things and it was one of the most productive years of my life. Many things that seem contradictory are in fact perfectly compatible when viewed from a broader perspective.” [Emphasis mine.]

This pushes back against my own belief that every moment has to be optimized in order for life to feel meaningful.

That’s categorically false!

I can waste time and still have an incredibly productive year. (Though, to be fair, what constitutes wasted time? A few hours spent mindlessly daydreaming about trip destinations or Googling random trivia or watching silly cat videos can be a lot of fun, even if it doesn’t feel particularly virtuous.)

I can be ambitious and restful. Structured and spontaneous. Serious about my work while also protecting space for personal pursuits.

Another section that stayed with me was her discussion about saying yes to opportunities before you know where they’ll lead. (Moving to Europe for almost 4 months, anyone??)

She talks about her reticence to swim with sharks, an experience her teenage son was especially keen to try. Well, she swam with sharks—and, spoiler alert, survived the experience—and then unexpectedly passed a pod of whales on the boat ride back to shore, which provided a magical end to the day.

In her words: “‘Yes’ makes possible a great many things.”

“Big breaks and big opportunities tend to come from saying yes to something that’s not in the normal run of show….It’s hard to see where a given thread will lead, professionally or personally. Life is full of serendipity—roughly defined as finding wonderful things you aren’t actively looking for.”

My friend Joy, who could win an award for the world’s most generous heart, offered to take in two cats for the people staying in our house while we’re in Europe. (I’m terribly allergic, so it wouldn’t work to have them at our place.) Pet-sitting hasn’t been without a few bumps along the way, but her family has fallen in love with the cats and cat ownership may be in their future… all because she said yes.

Another friend, Sophie, is an academic researcher in Australia. She also happens to have two young children. In other words, her life is extremely busy. Yet instead of simply plodding along through the never-ending list of work and home responsibilities, she’s currently away on a week-long fiction masterclass taught by a bestselling author. It may open exciting doors. At the very least, it’s giving her a chance to invest in a creative pursuit she genuinely loves.

More than anything, you get the sense Laura wants people to create a life they find exciting. Yes, adult routines can feel like drudgery. But if you do the math, each week contains 168 hours. Even after you account for work, trips to the grocery store, tackling the laundry pile, and sleep, there is usually quite a bit of flexible time left over (especially if you’re honest about how you’re spending those flexible hours).

There’s no right or wrong answer. As it turns out, many of us have far more autonomy over our days than we think.

“In general, you want to spend less time on things you need to talk yourself into…Instead, look for ideas or possibilities that you start talking yourself out of… The initial excitement is telling. Everything else is logistics. You’ll probably figure it out.”

I closed the book and started to think: what am I excited to see on my calendar?

Not: what seems impressive. Not: what is merely sensible. (If nothing else, I’m sensible; perhaps that’s why my daughter thinks I give off a Laura Ingalls vibe in both clothing choices and personality.)

What genuinely energizes me before practicality starts giving its little speech?

That framing alone made Big Time worth reading.

From broad-picture ideas (taking an hour each week to work on something professionally that interests you) to practical decisions that make everyday life more enjoyable: “You can make sure your kids’ bookshelves are curated with stories you enjoy, hiding such monstrosities as The Giving Tree up on the top shelf.” (Feel free to reach out to Laura directly if you happen to love Shel Silverstein.)

Throughout the book, Laura also weaves recurring encouragement to trust yourself. Trust that you can follow through on the life you’re trying to build. So many goals fail not because we lack ambition, but because somewhere along the way we stop believing ourselves when we make commitments.

One of the most practical reminders in the book also happens to be one of the simplest: “Twenty minutes a day, if it’s truly daily, is about 120 hours in a year—the equivalent of taking three weeks off work to devote to your goal, without actually having to do that.”

That’s classic Laura! Tiny tweaks, done consistently over time. (It also seems like a good cousin to my beloved Three times a week makes a habit.)

And perhaps that’s ultimately why her books are so comforting to me. They don’t demand a completely different life. They simply ask me to participate more intentionally in the one I already have.

I started writing blog posts three times a week. Now, I post almost daily and have a community of friends from around the world. I’ve spent a weekend hanging out with Laura’s co-host on Best Laid Plans, Sarah, and met blogging friends Sophie, Kyria, Suzanne, Birchie, Kae, and Catrina, with more fun meetups on the horizon.

As Laura puts it in Big Time:

“Putting big and worthwhile things into a schedule actually makes you feel like you have more time, because in your mind, you become the kind of person who has the time to do big and worthwhile things.”

Big and worthwhile isn’t a static definition. The goal isn’t to squeeze more into life for the sake of productivity, but to create a life expansive enough to hold the people and activities that matter most.

GIVEAWAY

Laura and I would love to send one lucky reader a signed copy of Big Time: A Simple Path to Time Abundance.

To enter, simply leave a comment below. Bonus points if you answer the following question: What would you like to do with 20 intentional minutes a day?

(Or, I’ll also accept your thoughts on what children’s book should be banished to the top shelf!!)

I’ll choose one winner at random over the weekend (I’m not nailing down a specific time because I have family visiting starting tomorrow!) and will announce the winner next Monday, 18 May.