It’s Friday the 13th. I’m not superstitious (at all), but even I have to admit I stopped to take note of the date.
We’re nearing the end of a perfectly fine week. It was neither horrible, nor wonderful. Nothing to write home about, my mother would say. But, of course, I AM going to write here about it.
School is…going. I suppose there were always going to be growing pains. But golly it’s hard for A to be separated from the majority of her friends and to add insult to injury her class is the only one that doesn’t have a spot in the dedicated Grade 8 wing. In fact, they’re literally at the other end of the school. It’s all pretty devastating! This will be an ongoing challenge throughout the year – though we’re brainstorming some potential solutions to pitch to the school administration (everyone in her class is distraught about being isolated from all the other Grade 8s) – but, then again, life is full of challenges and we’re trying to find creative ways to ease her discomfort.
Starting with a party.
Today.
A six-hour party.
Yes, you read that right. When a “Back to School” bash was originally suggested, I was thinking 6:30-9:30 pm. But John and A schemed the timing and we’ve ended up with SIX WHOLE HOURS of 10 girls at/around the 13-year mark in our bungalow. It will be quite something. I’m assuming/hoping they self-direct most of the games and entertainment and we will simply be there to pay for and dispense food at appropriate intervals.
I’m excited for her, already exhausted for me, and feeling confident it will go off without a hitch and be a fun and memorable night for all.
On to happy things from the week.
A YUMMY LUNCH DATE
For some reason – for the first time ever – I have to pay next year’s “projected personal taxes” (which the Canadian government has very kindly projected for me with, it seems, a healthy buffer in their favour) in instalments – it’s no fun to pay in advance, but hopefully this means I won’t have to pay at tax time and/or will get a refund? After finalizing things at the bank, John and I took ourselves out for a quick and delicious lunch date.
Back to Cumin we went. We split the Spicy Korean cauliflower as an appetizer and each had a delicious fresh pasta dish. I ordered Sugo Alla Genovese because the ingredient list (slow roasted beef shank, onion ragu, fresh rigatoni, parmesan) was reminiscent of my favourite meal from Italy. It didn’t disappoint!
John ordered a vegan dish with fresh local veggies which was also delicious.
CLEAN WASHROOMS
Okay, stay with me here. After leaving the restaurant, I went to use the washroom and they were so clean I stopped to take a picture. I think the cleanliness really stands out to me after our recent trip to Portugal where the bathrooms were at best reasonably clean and, more commonly, at worst reminiscent of a horror scene. The floor wasn’t sticky! There was toilet paper! The water coming out of the taps was both warm and started immediately. There was soap! Glory be…
I also still love this coat! I think it looks happy and it makes me feel happy.
HAPPY SHOES
John and I were joking the other day that I should start a blog dedicated to thrifted fashion. I will not be doing this, but when I pulled some of my favourite summer wedges out of the closet for the first time this summer (perhaps the only time they will get worn in 2024 because Winter is coming) it made me smile. I’ve owned these shoes for a decade and they always make me happy. I love black, but the pop of neon colour make them extra cheerful!
I paired these (thrifted) shoes with a thrifted jumpsuit, thrifted shirt, thrifted bra, and thrifted sunglasses.
COFFEE WITH JOY
For years (and years – I’ve lost track of how many), Joy and I have celebrated the first week of school by meeting for coffee. And yesterday was that day. The sun was shining, our favourite coffee shop was abuzz with the regular group of seniors.
I always, always, always order an Earl Grey, but this time the special drink lured me in.
Behold – a Whipped Cinnamon Maple Latte. A bit sweeter than I normally take my coffee, but so festive and delicious and it felt nice to commemorate a new year of school (which is off to a bit of a rocky start) with something extra special.
As always, Joy is a wonderful confidante and sounding board. Summer was busy for both of us and we were a bit like shipping passing in the night. It was nice to cast anchor and finally catch up.
KIDS PACKING LUNCHBOXES
So many readers weighed in over the last year suggesting I have the kids pack their own lunchboxes and that’s exactly what we’re doing.
A is in the habit of preparing two days at once. L does it a day at a time. So far, they are sticking to a specific set of favourites and I’m not too fussed if they eat the same thing over and over.
My role is washing their lunch dishes and making sure there are suitable ingredients in the cupboard and fridge. I’ve repurposed a magnetic whiteboard sheet so I can write down exactly what we have on hand from week to week.
TUESDAY’S OFF
I am nervous about next week. We officially start extracurriculars and I know it will be okay, but I also know it will exhaust me.
One difference I’m excited for: this year – currently – Tuesday is a completely open evening. (I am crossing every finger and toe that L’s basketball practice doesn’t get scheduled for Tuesday.) Monday and Wednesday are late nights, so it feels good to have a reset early in the week.
YOGA
I was nervous to attend my first in-person yoga class in almost 20 years but it went well. The first class was a warm yin practice. I’ve never done yin yoga before and it is surprisingly hard to stay in some poses for those extended holds. But it was good and I was proud of myself for booking a class and going.
Who should show up to the class and put her mat next to mine (last available space) but my therapist!! Well now she KNOWS I’m telling the truth about carving out time to stretch and work on breathing.
BONUS ROUND
- Sunshine. It’s always a delight.
- Crisp mornings + warm afternoons. I will write about this happy thing until we fade into frigid mornings and cold afternoons and then I will struggle mightily to find anything good to say about the weather. For now…the weather is a very happy thing.
- Surviving the ice cream social + Open House at school. So many people and some tricky dynamics. I made it through the night.
- Meeting L’s teacher. Because of some paperwork issues, she was only able to start yesterday (a week into the school year). I was so nervous since he’s in a very small cohort of Grade 4’s in a split 4/5 class. I think his teacher is going to be a perfect fit for L and I left feeling confident this is going to be a really formative and special year for him.
- Bedtime snuggles.
- Making the kids laugh.
- Sitting on A’s bed while she made bracelets for friends and not talking. We just sat without conversation and listened/sang along with Disney hits on Spotify. It was really lovely.
- Cold water for drinking. Warm water for showering.
- That A received a postcard from pint-sized friends travelling to Newfoundland. (It’s equally exciting for your kids to receive snail mail!)
- Receiving a SECOND postcard from those same friends the very next day! Two postcards from one vacation? Mind blown.
And that’s a wrap. Now I’m off to brace for the tidal wave of teens headed my way.
Your turn. What does your weekend look like? How do you handle gross bathrooms on the road? Have you ever tried yin yoga?
Coree
Also a neutral week here… and it’s gotten cold already! It was the first week of term, but I’m not teaching, thank goodness… so it was just trying to get my tutees to meet with me (I offered good biscuits but only 3/15 showed up). My husband is headed to Canada (Sunshine Coast to see his dad) tomorrow, so he’s away. T is used to me leaving but not daddy, and I found him in the kitchen sobbing. But luckily Grandma has arrived from Portugal to keep us company. So it’ll be snacks, endless rounds of Uno, and all the NY Times puzzles for the next week and a bit.
Elisabeth
I’m always worried about an early cold snap in the fall. Some falls are a very short window of nice weather and that makes me sad!
Poor T. It’s the opposite with my kids and even though it happens routinely, it still always throws off emotions and rhythms!
I’m so glad your mom is able to visit. That will be a nice chance for you to spend time together and of course for her to dote on her grandson. Win, win!
Jenny
Ooh, good luck with the party! Yes, I’m sure the girls will do there own thing- you just have to put the food out. What a great thing for A to have, after the rough start to the school year.
I’m sitting in Starbucks right now drinking my usual Earl Grey, but I’m getting envious of everyone drinking their fancy fall drinks! Even my daughter has been making chai lattes. We have a sugar free chai latte mix at home and I’m going to make one for myself this weekend.
Nice job on the yoga class, and yes it’s funny that your therapist was there. And, your thrifted outfit is SO CUTE!!!
Elisabeth
So far so good. We are 45 minutes into the party and they have dispersed. Only 5.25 hours to go. I’m really hoping a movie is involved because everyone will stay happy through that?! But it really is hilarious to listen to the giggles and conversations of 10 teenagers.
Yay for Earl Grey. I will be going back to that the next time I visit a coffee shop. For one, it’s a whole lot cheaper and I’m not a huge fan of sugary drinks so Earl Grey with oat milk or cream suits me just fine the majority of the time. But a sugar-free latte chai sounds amazing. I’ve only had one chai latte and my only problem with it was how sweet it was! I swear I have a sweet tooth, but something about overly sweet drinks really turns me off.
I did ANOTHER round of yoga today. It was a lot more intense and the sweat was DRIPPING off my body (gross), but it felt good and I felt strong and committed to going back again next week.
sarah
Dorothy and Coop are packing their own lunches this year, and it is a delight. Amnd? I don’t care if they ate what they packed because I didn’t have to pack it!
Elisabeth
DELIGHT is the perfect word. I went to the grocery store today and stocked up for next week. They eat slightly different things than I would pack, but there is fruit and there is veg and there is dessert and there is some carb and they even are responsible to fill and pack their own water bottles. It sounds small but it is kinda a huge deal!
Birchie
Ouch to the 6 hours but hey with any luck it will be a great time for the kids/not too rough on the parents. You totally could do a thrifted fashion blog and it would be fabulous.
It’s Boy Scout camp weekend so I’m headed off to “glamp”. I got a good deal on points for my hotel so I feel like quite the travel hacker.
Elisabeth
I think it will be great.
One said of the fashion coin is that I have a fairly minimal wardrobe. When I buy something new (well, thrifted new), I tend to take another item to consignment. So I think I’d run out of content extremely fast, but it was a fun conversation for a chuckle.
Glamping sounds amazing. Can I admit that every time I hear about your frequent solo weekends while your husband and the boys are away I feel jealous. They’re happy and occupied and you’re happy and occupied. It seems like such a wonderful win, win. Will Doggo go with you or board somewhere?
Ally Bean
My father was a doctor and he judged restaurants first on the cleanliness of their restrooms, secondly on their food. His belief was if the restrooms were spotless so was the kitchen. His logic still holds.
Elisabeth
This is one of the smartest things I’ve ever heard. And, honestly, likely accurate 99% of the time.
Michelle G.
Oh my goodness, what is the school thinking to separate the 8th graders like that? As if 8th grade isn’t hard enough? To separate one class off and essentially demote them like that has to be traumatic. And then she’s separated from all her friends? Poor A. I know the teen years are filled with angst, but in this case, I think it’s justified! It makes me want to come there and knock some heads together!! Ok, I’m kidding. Sort of.
Elisabeth
It really is quite traumatic and there is a growing number of parents banding together to respectfully request/demand a change about the isolation (being separated from most of her friends isn’t something we can influence). It really isn’t fair and they will only get to experience this year once. Also, our daughter has been at this particular school for EIGHT years (this is her 9th) and literally since the first year there has been a hush and awe about the 8th Grade Wing. It it built up to be the absolute pinnacle of middle school and to have that stripped away?
Onward and upward and hoping the administration is open and willing to work with us parents of involved kiddos to find a workable solution.
Colleen Martin
That is one long party! So nice of you to get her together with her friends that she is missing though! My kids school has one class per grade and the school is Pre-K through 8th so they mostly complain about being with the same people for ten years and are really ready for high school. You do find such nice thrifting pieces, I should try it more but I get in my head with the smells and the dirtiness potential. And I’m not a snob! We take lots of hand me downs from people we know, but how do you get over that part? Maybe Canadian thrift shops are nicer than the ones near me 🙂
Elisabeth
I’m picky about where I go. I have a favourite thrift shop and that is the primary source for me. It’s small, but doesn’t set off my allergies and everything is generally clean, doesn’t have holes and – most importantly – there are change rooms. I hate buying clothes from a thrift store where you can’t try things on.
I didn’t even think about being in the same grade with all the same kids! That could be equally (or more problematic)!
NGS
Yin yoga is my favorite! I feel so stretchy after holding those poses for an extended period of time. It’s also a way for me to really focus on meditation and breath. Woot woot! Good job!
I’m not particular about restrooms, to be honest. I always have Purell in my bag, so if worse comes to worse, I’ll just clean up afterwards.
Elisabeth
Thanks! I hope to go to yin again this week (I’m signed up, so barring any issues I WILL be going). Friday I went to a vinyasa class and I was sweating SO much (and I’m so sore today – lots of planking!), but it was great in a different way.
I never carry Purell, but definitely need to start taking it on trips 😐
J
I’ve never heard of yin yoga, I’m going to have to check that out. I am pretty happy with Adriene’s speed of yoga. I remember doing flow yoga at a gym years ago and hating it, we barely got into a pose before jumping out again.
Kids doing their own lunches is such a win/win. When my daughter started doing her own lunches, I was shocked that she wanted the same thing day after day. All of that mental energy I had put in, for years, FOR NOTHING.
Estimated taxes sounds stressful. What if you had to save all year in order to have the money? What then? Hmmm.
The most disgusting bathroom I ever visited was not actually dirty. Just gross. It was a rest stop in Western France, and you went into the stall and there was a hole in the ground. That’s it. I mean, maybe there was toilet paper, but I honestly don’t remember, I just decided I didn’t need to go THAT badly, and left. I guess I’ve changed since I was a kid and had to pee/poop in the back woods of Alaska!
Elisabeth
I know what you mean – I always tried to mix things up with their lunches. That said, I think because they’re preparing them, they don’t care as much because they realize the path of least resistance is following the same formula over and over.
I don’t know about the estimated taxes. I wonder if it is random? Like some years you might get chosen and other years not (John doesn’t have to do it, just me?). Thankfully we can afford to pay upfront and hopefully this means I won’t owe a cent come tax season (which, admittedly would be nice!).
JUST A HOLE IN THE GROUND. Oof. I would not handle that well. At least going outside the ground and smell aren’t disgusting. I think I’d take the woods over a lot of the bathrooms I used in Portugal.
Grateful Kae
Oof, trust me, I’ve seen some YUCKO bathrooms in Latin America….. It’s sort of a “thing” there that you should probably carry toilet paper in your purse at all times, because it’s super common to find they just don’t stock in in the bathrooms. (Although, compared to like 15 years ago, I feel like the bathroom situation is slowing improving, overall, so maybe people finally started realizing that this is just not cool.) There also have been times when I’ve used a (gross) bathroom in Mexico and not necessarily found…. soap. Which then is like, oh dear, who is cooking my food right now and with what hands?? !!!! Anyway. I try not to overthink it and just stock my hand sanitizer and toilet paper. Like I said, our last few trips I was pleased to see overall bathroom improvements. Haha. I definitely appreciate a nice clean bathroom!
Elisabeth
I agree that you can’t overthink it! But, yeesh. And A was NOT a fan. I think girls tend to care more because we spend a lot more time in bathrooms. And that brings me to a pet peeve. Why do they give the same amount of square footage to men as women. I cannot begin to count home many times A and I waited in huge, long lines while men zoomed past getting in immediately to the mens side. Clearly we need more stalls FOR THE PEOPLE WHO CANNOT PEE STANDING UP.
I spent a lot of time reflecting on the state and availability and capacity of bathrooms…
Sophie
Wow that party is long! But I think teen girls can just hang out forever talking and not get bored (I certainly could with my friends at that age!). Well done with the yoga! I have NOT managed to do any yoga yet. Maybe next month… And I’m sorry to hear that A’s class isn’t in the Grade 8 wing, they definitely need to rectify it!
Elisabeth
It was long. A couple of hours too long, maybe, after a long day of school but it went well and was a lot of fun and I couldn’t believe how quickly they inhaled the food! It was like a feeding frenzy with only crumbs remaining when the dust settled.
coco
i love clean bathrooms too, to me that’s the most important place to check whether it’s a fine restaurant or not. how clean the bathroom is how likely clean the kitchen would be. So I always check 🙂
we’re hosting sofia’s 12th birthday next weekend, between water park and our place, 6 girls i think. she’s organizing the whole thing so I am pretty chill about it.
brilliant idea about packing their own lunches. Sofia can do it now as long as I tell her what’s in the fridge to reheat, Lizzy can’t yet and it’s fine for us as I make thing super simple. Hope one day I’m off duty on both kids.
Elisabeth
This is the first year either kids is wholly responsible for it. So far, so good. A likes to prepare two days lunches at a time, so she only has to do things three days a week! As long as it works for her, I’m happy.
Lisa’s Yarns
Last week was an intense week for me between travel and so many zoom meetings plus trying to be social since I was in a different office. I was worn out! I was so happy to get home on Thursday night. 3 night trips are just a bit too long for me and my family so I am glad I only have 1-2 longer trips left.
I encounter gross bathrooms quite often… I just try to make my visit as short as possible! It is nice when you encounter a pristine bathroom!
I’m sorry to hear about the challenging school set up for A. That is really tough and isolating!!
Elisabeth
That sounds so intense, Lisa.
The school situation is really tough. We’re seeing what we can do. Other families with kids in the class are starting to band together because it’s not just A that’s upset, it’s all the kids that are isolated. Not great for the mental health of middle-schoolers.
Nicole MacPherson
By now the party is all done, and I hope it went off well. Those school things are so devastating for kids. I hope the party is a blast. I myself have hosted similar parties in size and duration and they were all fine, I think I just kept bringing food and everything was good.
I love that you and your therapist are taking yoga self-care!
That tax thing happened with my MIL too and I thought there was some kind of error. But no, that’s what it is. It’s just so weird to me.
Elisabeth
I wonder if the tax thing is random? I have to do it, but John doesn’t? Sometimes I swear the CRA just picks names out of a hate and assigns different requirements. Hoping it means I pay nothing in April…or better yet, get a nice big refund?
Tobia | craftaliciousme
Reading through your week it sounds like you are finding your way back into routine, everyone is settling you doing things for yourself and enabling the kids to take charge on their lunches. I am happy it’s a good time for you right now.
That coffee date with Joy sounds lovely and every once in a while splurging in a fancy coffee is so fun.
I love your thrifted outfit. you will forever be my thrift store queen. I was planning on going to more thrift stores this year. And while I have entered a few I dint leave with anything. Most don’t cary my size or I didn’t find anything. But I am willing to keep trying.
Elisabeth
Ha – thrift store queen. I wear the title proudly, though I’m not sure I’ve earned it yet.
It can be so frustrating to shop second-hand. Sometimes I leave with nothing, but finding a good shop and then returning to it consistently is how I prefer to thrift. Once a month or so I make sure to go to my favourite store and browse quickly through the bins and racks. It takes about an hour and I seem to find a steady stream of needed replacement items or just things I want to add to my wardrobe for a fresh kick of fashion energy.
Melissa
Gross bathroom? Try to touch as little as possible, and certainly don’t look too closely. For the most dire situations try not to breathe too much. We have these public toilets blocks in Melbourne that have vintage cast-iron walls and doors and there is one near where we start running club on Thursdays and Saturdays so I’ve had to use it a number of times. Luckily they are fairly dark inside so you can’t see too much detail. I’m in awe of your thrifting ability and style. Very impressive.
Elisabeth
Ha – I guess having a gross bathroom be dark is one solution. Still – *shudder*. There were a few bathrooms in Portugal where my sneakers stuck to the floor. I didn’t even want to know…
Stephany
One of the inside jokes of my book club is about a public bathroom we went into once where they only had a BAR OF SOAP as their handsoap. I never used the bathroom thank god, but it was an EXPERIENCE for them. (It was a small bathroom in a local shop, so I’m guessing it wasn’t used much? Eeks.)
A six-hour party – you are one brave soul!
Elisabeth
Shared hand soap in a public bathroom – now that’s a first.
It was a long six hours but we made it and it was a mostly positive experience for all (I mean there was always going to be a bit of drama with TEN teenage girls, right?)
San
I am so sorry A is separated from her friends and then her class is also separated from the other 8th grade classes… what in the world was the school thinking? This is hard for 13-year-olds! I do hope the party will be a big success and lots of fun to ease into the is challenging school year.
Oh, yin yoga. Yes! I do take yin yoga classes (on the Peloton app) now and then. I sometimes substitute them for a stretch because of the longer poses!
So wonderful to read about your coffee date with Joy 🙂 That made me smile.
Elisabeth
We’re doing what we can to move the needle on the issue and we’ve submitted some suggestions. I know other parents are joining the fray, and I suspect there will be strength in numbers but it hasn’t been the best start to a school year, that’s for sure.
Daria
I love that whole outfit, Elisabeth! Thanks for your comment on my blog the other day. Things have been rough but they will get better. I need to stay grounded and just take it day by day. Yin yoga is my favorite! It is so relaxing, I just want to go to bed afterwards. I also like that you hold poses for a while allowing yourself to kind of “sink” into them. Ahhh. Oh and crisp mornings are the best!
Elisabeth
Awww. Thanks.
You have had such a rough patch – the accident, T away, a new year of school, and now the passing of Athena. I wish I could reach through the screen and give you a giant hug. <3